Wednesday, March 17, 2010

4x19 - The Dress Is Always Greener

Raven is sitting at her desk in Donna Cabonna's designing studio, arranging a pot of flowers.


RAVEN

I'm gonna put you here, and I'm going to put you there ... yes I am, yes I am! You're beautiful. Donna's gonna love you.


Stressed, Donna walks out.


DONNA

(firm) Do it again.


RAVEN

(outraged) Huh, what?! Miss Donna! I just did them three times. (reaches for her folder) Don't you want to see something new, like one of my new designs?


DONNA

First things first Raven. I need this flower arrangement to be done properly. I'm looking for color, balance and harmony. Now, do it again.


She turns away.


RAVEN

Man, I want to be a fashion designer. Not a flower rearranger.


Tiffany comes racing in and towards Donna.


TIFFANY

Donna, I've got some bad news.


DONNA

Well, can you make it sound like good news?


TIFFANY

I'll try. (sounding happy) Your rival and arch enemy Lora Stelladora just moved in upstairs!


Donna's comprehension dawns to annoyance. Raven walks over.


DONNA

(stretched) Lora Stelladora! I can't believe she's doing it to me again!


RAVEN

Hey, didn't you two start out together?


DONNA

Yes, we used to be the best of friends. But then she became obsessed with having everything I had. I have my own firm, she has her own firm. I date a rock star, she dated that rock star. I move to San Francisco, here she is.


RAVEN

Man, that's terrible, yeah. Which rock star?


DONNA

That is not the point. (as if in discretion) Mick Jagger.


RAVEN

(turning away, worked up) Oh, snap!


DONNA

I just can't believe that conniving, manipulative --- (Lora enters) Lora! Darling! Welcome.


LORA

Oh, Donna! Sweetie pussy cat! (Donna and Lora hug)


***


OPENING CREDITS


***


In Donna's office Donna is still making Lora welcome.


DONNA

Oh, Lora, here you are in San Francisco, (annoyed; to Raven and Tiffany) just like me.


LORA

Yes, together again, huh? (looking around) Oh, I love what you have done with your office. Huh? So drab. Donna, show Lora around, huh?


DONNA

Oh, well. Here's the office, there's the door. Don't let it hit you.


Lora chuckles, before turning and spotting eyes on the flowers that Raven arranged earlier on. She approaches them.


LORA

Oh! There is a bright spot, thank goodness. Huh? This flower arrangement's so whimsical. It feels me with whim.


Raven smiles as Lora reaches down and smells the flowers.


RAVEN

Oh, you think my flowers have whim? (Lora nods) Oh, thank you. (to Donna) Whim's good, right?


LORA (to Raven)

Oh, come to Lora. Come to Lora, don't be shy. Oh, bella.


Raven comes before Lora. Lora places a hand on Raven's chin.


LORA

What's your name?


Donna can't be quicker to intervene. She runs over and pulls Raven away.


DONNA

Uh-uh-uh, her name is Raven, she's my intern, and she has to get back to work. (clicking) Okay, everybody, back to work.


Raven walks back to her desk.


LORA (heading for the door)
Well, I have to get back to my office to. Which is actually (points upwards) above yours! (waving) Ta-tah.


Lora chuckles as she walks away. Donna watches her go, also chuckling. Lora turns back and chuckles again. Eventually the two of them end up in a chucking contest. Donna wins the most violent laugh. Lora scurries out when Donna's chuckle becomes a scream. Donna turns back to her office.


DONNA (to Raven in passing, about the flowers)

Raven, I thought I told you to do them again!


RAVEN

Okay, but you're about to mess up the whim.


***


Cory is sitting at the kitchen bench at his house while Victor is behind the counter. Chelsea and Eddie come running in from the back door with excited grins.


EDDIE

Check it out, check it out!


CHELSEA

You guys, you guys. I grew the most amazing potato in the community garden.


Chelsea can barely hold her excitement as she looks through her handbag and holds up a potato with abnormal shaping on it's skin for Victor and Cory to see.


EDDIE

Who does it look like, who does it look like? (pause) Abraham Lincoln, right?!


CHELSEA

Right, right.


Victor reaches fro the potato.


VICTOR

Oh, that is amazing. It looks exactly like Abraham Lincoln.


CHELSEA

I know.


CORY

Right, the dude on the penny.


VICTOR

Uh, Cory, he's known for other things.


CORY

You're exactly right. He's also on the five-dollar bill.


VICTOR

This is really amazing.


He hands the potato back to Chelsea.


CHELSEA

I know, I can't wait to show the vegetarian club. They're gonna freak!


Chelsea runs out the back door again.


VICTOR

That was amazing.


Victor walks back into the kitchen. Cory takes Eddie aside.


CORY

You thinking what I'm thinking?


EDDIE

Yeah, your daddy is easily amazed.


CORY

No, man! We're gonna make a lot of money off that potato.


***


Back at Donna's office, Raven clicks impatiently on the button as she waits for the elevator to arrive.


RAVEN

Oh, come on! I wanna' go home. I can't believe I arranged flowers all day.


The elevator door beeps open. Lora is inside.


LORA

Oh, flower girl!


RAVEN (with a big grin)

Hi, nice to see you again.


LORA

Yes, it is nice to see me, huh? Come. Take a ride with Lora Stelladora.


Lora takes Raven's hand and drags her, albeit violently, into the elevator with her. The door shuts.


LORA

So, Raven, huh? What exactly you do for Donna?


RAVEN

Oh, well. I go to the mail room, I sharpen the pencils, I arrange the flowers again and again and again – well, you can stop me when you get bored – and again, and again...


LORA (interrupting)
Oh, but, you want to be designer, no?


RAVEN

No. W-w-wait, no means yes. Yes! Yes I do. Yes!

LORA

Oh, so life with Donna not exactly a "big bucket of fun", huh?


RAVEN

Well, I mean...it used to be, but lately, I dunno', she's just...


LORA

Raven.


RAVEN

Huh?


LORA

How you like to go happiest place on Earth?


RAVEN (excited grin)

You mean...


LORA (interrupting)

Yes! My office!


RAVEN

Huh?


LORA

Come!


Lora takes Raven by the hand and drags her out into her office when the door opens.


LORA (forcing a grin on Raven's face)

I think you will like what you see and see what you like.


Lora leads Raven into the office – a nice, classy, stylish room with a dozen or so designers at work. Raven gasps as she looks around, obviously impressed with what she sees.


LORA

I know! It's so Stelladorable, huh? (calling out) Everyone! Say chow to Raven!


DESIGNERS

Chow, Raven!


RAVEN

Chow, 'peeps, what it is.


LORA

Raven! I just had cooko-nutty idea, huh? (gesturing for Raven to come closer) Come. What if you, Raven, come work for me, Lora Stelladora?


RAVEN

Wow, thank you Miss Lora! B-but, wait, I already intern for Miss Donna, so...


LORA

Oh, intern? No. I was thinking more designer position.


Raven almost loses her balance when Lora says this.


RAVEN (leaning back on thin air)

Oh, wait a second – a designer?


LORA

Yes.


RAVEN

I've always wanted to be a designer! Cool beans! Cool beans! B-but wait, wait. What about Miss Donna?


LORA

Oh, Raven. This is your cool beans moment, huh?


RAVEN

Yes, cool beans, yes.


LORA

Say it with me. Yes. Before, puff, there it goes.


RAVEN (desperate)

No, wait, come back! Designer! I want to be a designer! Yes, yes, yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!


***


Chelsea, Eddie and Cory are sitting down on the couch in the Baxter living room. The potato that looks like Abraham Lincoln is on the coffee table.


CHELSEA (unsure)

Ummm...I dunno' guys, I don't really wanna' let Potato Abe out of my sight.


CORY

Chelsea, come on! A natural wonder such as this comes along once-in-a-lifetime. You-you can't be selfish.


EDDIE

Yeah!


CHELSEA

Well, you'll treat him with respect, right?


CORY

Absolutely.


EDDIE

With the dignity a potato deserves, all right?


CORY

Right.


CHELSEA (satisfied)

Okay, you guys. Just give me a few more minutes with him.


Chelsea takes the potato and starts staring at it. Cory clicks and shoots a look at Eddie, and the two of them run into the next room. Raven comes running in through the front door. Chelsea jumps up from the couch and hides the potato behind her back.


RAVEN

Chelsea, I'm so glad you're here! (she and Chelsea sit down) I have the most unbelievable life-changing news. (really excited) Lora Stelladora offered me a job as a designer!


Raven screams, and Chelsea's excited – but not for her friend.


CHELSEA

Well, I had to one up you, but I just grew a potato that looks like Abe Lincoln!


Chelsea shows the potato from behind her back. Raven screams with half-hearted excitement and equally forced smile, before getting up and pacing back to her problem.


RAVEN

Anyway. It all happened so fast, I took the job without talking to Donna first. Do you think I did the right thing?


CHELSEA

I 'dunno, Rae. (looking at the potato) What do you think, potato Abe? Huh?


Chelsea stands up and holds up the potato, as she starts an impression of Abraham Lincoln.


CHELSEA (pretending to be Abe)

"Well, Raven, (???) and seven years ago..."


But Raven turns away, as she finds herself transfixed in a vision...


***


In Raven's vision, she's looking at Donna, who's standing in the elevator at the office.


DONNA

Raven, you're fired.


***


The vision comes to an end as we cut back to the present. Chelsea is still impersonating Abe.



CHELSEA (pretending to be Abe)

And the home of the brave, play ball.


RAVEN

Chelsea, I just had a vision. (dignified) Donna is gonna' fire me.


CHELSEA

Hey! Then I guess you did the right thing, you know, by taking the other job.


RAVEN

Yeah, that's right!


CHELSEA

Yeah.


RAVEN

Yeah, and you know what? I'm not gonna' let my vision come true. Because before she can fire me, I'm going in there tomorrow, I'm gonna' quit. That's what I'm gonna' do.


***


The following morning, Raven walks into Donna's office with a deep breath.


RAVEN

Miss Donna, I need to talk to you.


DONNA

Oh, actually, I have something to say to you first.


Raven follows Donna to her desk.


RAVEN

Yeah, I know. And before you say what you have to say, I'm gonna say what I have to say...


DONNA (interrupting)

Since I'm the boss, I'll say what I have to say first.


RAVEN

True. But, I'll go first because I think that I need...


DONNA (interrupting)

Enough!


RAVEN

Okay...


DONNA

What I wanted to say to you was, (pause) Raven, I'm sorry.


RAVEN

You know what? I knew you were going to...(realizes what has been said to her)...Huh? (sits down) Did you say sorry?


DONNA

I know I've been a little tough on you lately. It's only because I believe you have so much potential.


RAVEN

Wait a second. Y-you're not gonna' fire me?


DONNA

Why would you think that?


RAVEN

Because I had a...


But Raven remembers who she is talking to.


RAVEN

...I had, uh, a feeling that you were. The flowers – arranging them over and over again, what was up with that?


DONNA

Raven. That was an exercise to train your fashion eye.


RAVEN

Color, harmony...(smiles)...and balance. Now I get it.


DONNA

Exactly! Those are skills you're gonna' need when you become a designer.


RAVEN

So you really think I can be a designer?


Donna gets up from her seat and approaches the now-standing Raven.


DONNA

Raven, I believe in you. I know it can be a little frustrating. I mean, you wouldn't believe how many interns don't have the dedication or loyalty to stick out.


RAVEN (guiltily)

Right, loyalty...


***


A little later on, Raven comes out of Donna's office talking to herself.


RAVEN (relieved)

Thank goodness I didn't quit.


Raven's mobile phone rings. She reaches over and grabs it from the table, looking at the caller ID. She screams.


RAVEN

It's Miss Lora!


Raven rolls her eyes around the room guiltily.


***


The phone is still ringing.


RAVEN (quietly to herself)

Okay, calm down. All right.


Raven flicks the lid of the phone up and raises it to her ear.


RAVEN

Hello?


Lora is on the phone upstairs in her office.


LORA

Raven, where are you? It is first day and here you are not.


RAVEN

Oh, yeah, umm...I'm sorry, Miss Lora, I was just uh, I was just talking to Miss Donna.


LORA

Okay. Come, my Bella, your career is waiting.


RAVEN

Yeah, but listen, um, I just wanna'...


But it's too late. Before Raven can finish, Donna has hung up her side of the conversation.


RAVEN

Man!


Raven flicks the lid of her phone down, and as she turns for the door, bumps into Tiffany.


RAVEN

Oh!


TIFFANY

Going somewhere?


RAVEN

Uh, I was gonna' take my break.


TIFFANY

You don't get a break.


RAVEN

Then just give me a break, I need five minutes.


TIFFANY

Okay, but I'm timing you.


Tiffany gets out a stopwatch.


TIFFANY

Four fifty-nine, fifty-eight, fifty-seven, fifty-six, fifty-five.


All this while Raven has run off.


***


Upstairs, Raven walks into Lora's office and is greeted by a line of designers applauding her arrival. Lora is at the end.


LORA

There's our superstar!


For a moment Raven takes the flattery, but then remembers why she is here.


RAVEN

W-w-w-wait. N-no, no, I've really been thinking about this job and I-I wanted to...


LORA (interrupting)

And you are wondering, "where am I going to make my magic"?


Lora starts pacing with Raven.


RAVEN

No, I...


Lora gestures at a comfortable looking desk in front of them.


LORA

Ta-da!


RAVEN

That's nice, but really I was...(notices how classy the desk is)...ta-da to me?


LORA

For you, Bella.


RAVEN

This is my desk?!


LORA

For you, Bella.


Raven runs up to the desk, Lora follows.


RAVEN (excited)

Oh, no, you didn't tell me this was my desk! You should've seen my other desk, it was...


Raven shows how small her desk is at Donna's office with her fingers.


LORA

Sit, sit, sit!


Lora pushes Raven down onto the seat.


LORA

This is your seat.


Raven leans back on the leather chair, her facial expression showing that she likes it.


RAVEN

Ohhhh...


LORA

And this, my Bella – your first assignment.


Lora flips open a page in a scrapbook on the desk, ready for Raven to start designing. Raven gasps.


RAVEN

An assignment?! All ready?!


LORA

Yes, yes.


RAVEN

Hey, ya'll, this chair is comfortable, man! (to an off-screen designer) Have you seen this?


LORA

Yes, yes, sit back.


Raven rests her feet up on the table.


LORA

And you will design for me party dress. Huh? Anything you want. Blow me away. Go crazy!


Lora uses her fingers to shoot guns up in the air. Raven sits back up and gets her head down to work, but the suddenly remembers why she is here.


RAVEN

W-w-w-wait, no, um...uh, I just...I just need five minutes.


LORA (to the office)

Everyone. Raven is going to design party dress in five minutes.


The office body applauds. Raven gets up her scrapbook and heads for the exit.


RAVEN

That's great, that's great. You know, I'm just going to go to the elevator, 'cause, you know, that's where a sister can do her best working.


LORA

Oh, you wacky-crazy genius girl.


RAVEN

You got me.


LORA (a little demanding)

Right, right. Get out of here.


Raven walks off. Lora watches her go.


LORA (to herself)

Beautiful.


***


Raven runs into the elevator just before the door closes. She opens her scrapbook and starts drawing.


RAVEN (to herself)

Okay, all right. Don't panic. Miss Donna, Miss Lora, in the same building. But you know what? You can work for both of them, and no one will ever know. No girl, no one will know.


Raven looks up from her book and sets eyes on a woman standing beside her.


RAVEN (covering her scrapbook)

I said no one!


Holding her briefcase, the woman runs out and the elevator door closes Raven in again.


***


Raven comes running into Donna Cabonna's design studio. Donna comes running out at Raven, who turns back but finds that it's too late to hide.


DONNA

Raven, where were you?


Raven grunts and turns fully back to face Donna.


DONNA

Oh, doesn't matter, doesn't matter. Now that Lora has moved in I need to step things up around here. I need fresh ideas.


RAVEN

Okay.


DONNA

So, I want to take a look at your designs.


Donna goes to take Raven's scrapbook from her hand.


RAVEN

No!


Donna tugs for the scrapbook and eventually wins.


DONNA

Raven, you've been begging me to take a look at your designs.


Donna starts flipping through the scrapbook.


RAVEN

I'm not quite finished yet...


Donna flips to the page with the party dress on it that Raven's been designing for Lora.


DONNA

Oh, a party dress! I love it. But...


Donna takes Raven over to a nearby desk and places the scrapbook on a table.


DONNA (taking a pen from Raven)

Thank you.


Donna starts drawing on the design.


DONNA

What you need to do is lower the neckline, see? And then taper it in, right there. Here, here, here, here.


Donna hands the pen to Raven and she sits down at the table in front of the book.


DONNA

You sit down, and you flesh it out.


Raven stands with the scrapbook.


RAVEN

Wait, you know what? How about I flesh it out in the elevator?


DONNA

Elevator?


RAVEN

Yeah, that's where I do my best fleshing.


DONNA

Go, go! Go flesh.


Raven runs off for the exit, but bumps into Tiffany again.


RAVEN

Five minutes?


Tiffany holds up a stopwatch.


TIFFANY

Starting, now.


Raven runs out the door as Tiffany keeps track of the time.


***


Meanwhile, back at the Baxter house, Eddie and Cory are standing in suits at the front door allowing people from the general public to walk right through into the living room. Cory is taking an admission fee. They're both dressed in suits.


EDDIE

Step right up! Step right up, ladies and gentleman. The show's about to start. Fill in the empty seats. Hurry, hurry, hurry.


Cory takes a final admission from a girl and holds back a young boy wanting to enter next.


CORY (to the line of people outside)

Oh, sorry about that bro. We're all sold out. Oh, please, don't go anywhere. The next show will be starting real soon, so stick around for that. Okay.


Eddie closes the door as Cory walks to the front of the audience counting his money. The people are seated in front of a small cardboard theatre with the curtains closed.


CORY

Hit it, Eddie.


Eddie turns off the lights and joins Cory in front of the audience.


CORY

Ladies and gentleman. Prepare to be amazed.


Cory takes out a remote and hits a switch which shines a spotlight on the curtain as band marching music starts to sound. Eddie and Cory start marching and saluting on the spot as the curtains on the small theatre slowly open to reveal Potato Abe dressed in a compromising suit and wearing a black top-hat. The audience smile.


EDDIE

Looks like Lincoln, huh?


CORY

It sure does.


And the show can't be over quicker. Cory hits the remote and the curtain shuts on the potato.


CORY

Well I hope you've enjoyed the show.


Eddie flicks the lights back on and gestures for the audience to exit through the kitchen door.


EDDIE

Ladies and gentleman, please exit through the gift shop where you can purchase your souvenir T-shirts, key chains, and potato peelers.


Eddie holds the door open and the group of people file through.


CORY (as the audience pass)

Yeah. I hope ya'll had a great time. A great time. (counting his money) 'Cause I know I did. Boy, I love America.


Eddie comes back to over to Cory, who hands him some money.


CORY

And here's a little piece for your pain and suffering. All right now. Let's bring in the next group.


Cory and Eddie tuck the money away in their suits and head for the door. Cory opens the door, expecting to find a line of people from the general public, but instead finds a smirking Chelsea standing alone with her arms crossed.


CORY

Oh, look. It's Chelsea.


EDDIE (waving at Chelsea)

Hey, Chelsea. How you doing?


Chelsea holds up a poster which is advertising a five-dollar admission fee to see an amazing potato that looks like Abraham Lincoln.


CHELSEA

You're charging people money to see my potato?


CORY

Yeah, and they're actually paying it.


Cory steps outside and looks to see if anyone is coming.


CORY

Hey! Where did all of my customers go?


CHELSEA

I sent them away. You guys, this is a work of nature from our community garden. Everyone should enjoy it, for free.


Cory takes a gasp and steps beside Chelsea.


CORY

Free?


CHELSEA

Yeah.


Chelsea chucks the flyer down on the couch and heads for the cardboard theatre.


CHELSEA

I'm taking Potato Abe back.


Eddie reaches for the potato and grabs it before Chelsea.


EDDIE

No, Chels! Uh, we'll split the money with you.


CHELSEA

I don't want your dirty spud money.


Chelsea reaches for the potato, but Eddie throws it over her head to Cory.


CHELSEA

Hey!

Chelsea runs for Cory.


CORY

Chelsea, just a few more shows!


Cory chucks the potato over to Eddie.


CHELSEA (turning to Eddie)

No way! Now give it!


EDDIE

But it's gonna rot soon anyway.


CHELSEA

Well I don't care! It's last day should be spent happy, not spent in some freak show.


Chelsea reaches for the potato, but Eddie throws it up in the air, aiming for Cory – but it goes flying in the opposite direction.


CHELSEA/EDDIE/CORY (played in slow motion)

No!


It's too late. The potato smashes to pieces as it hits the floor before Cory can reach it. Chelsea runs down and picks up the two main halves.


CHELSEA (screaming)

Why?!!!!


***


Back at the offices, the elevator door opens and Raven is standing inside with her scrapbook. Lora is waiting outside.


LORA

Okay, time's up. No more upsie-downsie, huh? Lay it on me.


Lora wrestles for the scrapbook.


RAVEN

No, I'm not done yet! I'm still tweaking. I just need five more minutes.


Eventually Lora gives in and Raven wins the book back. Lora places her hands on her hips as Raven closes the elevator door and heads back down. Just as she starts drawing, the door opens again to reveal Tiffany standing beside Donna.


DONNA

Okay Raven, what have you got?


RAVEN

Uh, I'm still tweaking.


DONNA

I thought you were fleshing.


RAVEN

R-r-r-r-right, I'm fleshing and I'm tweaking. I'm fleaking.

TIFFANY

And I'm still timing.


Tiffany gets out her stopwatch and looks down on it.


TIFFANY

Forty-six, forty-five, forty-four, forty-three, forty-two...


Raven's shut herself into the elevator again. As the doors close, some classical jazz music starts playing through the PA. She looses attention and starts moving about a little to the tune. A few moments later, she remembers her intention.


RAVEN

What am I doing?


Just as she gets back into drawing, the door opens and she screams – Lora is waiting for her.


LORA

Okay, kiddo. Time's up. No more upsie-downsie, huh? Lay it on me.


Lora steps into the elevator with Raven. The door closes as she shows her work with a frown.


LORA (looking at Raven's design)

Oh, I like it. I especially like what you've done with the neckline.


RAVEN (under her breath)

Well, that's Donna's. (realizes what she has said) I mean, it's not Donna...done-yet.


LORA

Oh no, of course not.


Lora takes the pencil and starts giving her tips, just as the door beeps and opens to reveal Tiffany and Donna again. They all scream.


DONNA

Raven, what's going on in here?


Donna steps in the elevator.


RAVEN (unsure what to say)

I'm innocent. I'm in here, I'm not really here actually...


The elevator door closes, leaving a curious Tiffany outside.


DONNA

Innocent of what?


Raven paces around in a circle as she thinks of an excuse.


RAVEN

Uh...I'm innocent at whatever you think that I'm doing.


LORA (to Donna)

Look how nervous you make the poor girl, on her very first day. Shame!


DONNA

First day of what?


RAVEN (lying)

Cuanza. (walking away) Wow, it really came early this year.


Raven innocently laughs as Donna snatches the scrapbook.


RAVEN

Wait, no!


DONNA

Raven? Are you showing our party-dress design to Lora?


Raven takes the book back and closes it shut.


LORA (laughs)

Your party dress? Oh, silly Donna. Raven and I are designing this together.


Lora teasingly places an arm over Raven's shoulder.


DONNA

Oh, no, no, no. Raven and I are designing this.


Donna drags Raven to her side.


RAVEN

You know, is it me or this elevator getting smaller and smaller?


DONNA

Raven?


RAVEN

Uh-huh?


DONNA

Have you been working for Lora behind my back?


LORA (gasps)

Have you been working for Donna in front of my behind?!


Conveniently, the elevator door buzzes open. Raven takes advantage of the opportunity.


RAVEN

Well, this is my stop!


Raven tries to make a run for it, but Donna and Lora pull her back in.


LORA/DONNA

Get back here!


The elevator door closes again.


DONNA (to Raven)

How long have you been stabbing me in the back?


RAVEN

Not long...I mean, I'm not. I was trying to tell you Miss Donna but I couldn't.


DONNA (to Lora)

This is oh-so typical of you.


Lora teasingly curls her hair with a grin.


DONNA (to Lora, continued)

Trying to steal my best intern.


LORA

Well, if she were happy, she would've never come to Lora. Like Mick Jagger.


RAVEN

Oh, snap!


Donna's had enough. She walks over and hits the emergency stop button.


DONNA

All right. If that's how it's gonna be.


A buzzing noise sounds as Raven goes to the elevator doors and leans up against them.


RAVEN

Hold up now, she's just turned off the elevator. We've got a problem.


Donna takes off her earrings, handing them to Raven and pushing her shoes aside.


DONNA (to Lora)

You have been jealous of me ever since we were young interns for Yvonne St. Lavough!


Donna starts circling Lora and corners her to the side of the elevator.


RAVEN

Oh, this is getting cramped ya'll.


LORA (circling Donna, crossing Raven)

Because Yvonne told me that you said I was a no-talent hack!


DONNA

What?! Yvonne said that you said I was a no-talent hack!


RAVEN

See, you're both no talent...I mean, uh, we really need to press the alarm button.


Raven quickly dashes to the side, away from the quarreling designers.


DONNA

Oh!


Raven circles around back in between Lora and Donna.


RAVEN

Listen, listen people! Okay. Three people, small area, (puts her fingers on her nostrils) not enough oxygen up in here!


Donna and Lora push Raven to the side. They're determined to get to the bottom of this, once and for all.


LORA

So, wait. Let me get this straight. You never said "Lora, no talent hack"?


DONNA

Of course not! In fact, I thought you were very talented.


LORA

No?


DONNA

Yes!


LORA

Really?


DONNA

Yes!


LORA

I thought the same about you!


DONNA

Oh!


LORA

I did.


All this while Raven has been sneaking up in between them.


RAVEN

I think Yvonne turned you against each other.


LORA

I think you're right. I mean, makes sense, right? Yvonne fill us with the lies, and the hate, and the poison, huh? Oh, well, at least it made us work harder.


DONNA

Yes, but it made us enemies.


LORA

Yes, well. It's been a bit of fun bugging you all these years.


DONNA

Oh, you were very good at it.


LORA

Oh, thank you. I do my best.


Lora and Donna laugh.


LORA

Kiss-kiss make up?


DONNA

Kiss-kiss make up!


LORA

Donna!


DONNA

Lora!


The two lean in and give each other a hug and an air-kiss. Meanwhile, they don't seem to be noticing Raven, who's standing right behind them trying to pull the elevator doors apart. She turns to them with panic-ridden on her face.


RAVEN

Can we get out of here?!!!! I can't breath! I can't breath!


DONNA

All right, all right. Let everyone get back to work.


Donna goes and over and hits the emergency button back in. The buzzing noise ceases. As the elevator starts moving again, the three of them go to the back.


RAVEN

Oh, thank goodness.


LORA (to Donna)
So, in gesture of our new friendship, I give you your intern back, ah?


Lora shows Raven's dimples by pressing on her cheek.


RAVEN

Thank you, Miss Lora.


DONNA

Welcome back, Raven.


RAVEN

Thank you, Miss Donna.


DONNA

And now that you're working for me again – Raven, you're fired.


Raven's facial expression shows how hurt she is.


LORA

Oh, that's harsh. (the elevator doors are open) Oh, now. Let me show you my office!


Donna takes Lora's hand, and, squealing, they run in to take a look at Lora's office. The woman with the briefcase from earlier steps into the elevator with Raven, who is staring blankly out after Donna and Lora.


WOMAN

Going down?


RAVEN (upset)

Way down.


Raven continues staring out as the woman reaches and presses the button, and the elevator doors close again.


***


Presumably the next day, Raven arrives at Donna's designing studio and is greeted by Tiffany at the door.


TIFFANY

What are you doing here?


RAVEN

I just came out to clean out my stuff.


TIFFANY

Done.


Tiffany hands Raven a box, which has confetti spread on the top of it. She blows it on Raven's face.


TIFFANY

Sorry about the confetti. I threw myself a little going away party for you.


Tiffany blows a party whistle in Raven's face.


RAVEN (somewhat ashamed)

Yeah, thank you. I just wanted to apologize to Miss Donna, so...


TIFFANY

Oh, I'll give her the message.


RAVEN (trying to dodge Tiffany standing in her way)

Oh, I bet you will.


Raven turns to exit. Satisfied Raven is gone, Tiffany turns in the opposite way. Raven quickly looks back and nicks past Tiffany, who goes flying to the ground with her arms spread trying to capture Raven. Raven walks into Donna's office. Donna is sitting at her desk flicking through a magazine.


RAVEN

Miss Donna, do you have a minute?


DONNA

No.


RAVEN

A second?


DONNA

Fine. Raven, what is it? I'm very busy.


RAVEN

Miss Donna? (Donna looks up) I know you were right to fire me. And I just wanted to say sorry for taking that job without talking to you first.


DONNA (standing)

Raven, you know, I never had children of my own.


RAVEN (touched)

And I was like a daughter to you?


DONNA

No, you convinced me I made the right choice. I gave, and gave, and gave, and you just didn't appreciate it.


RAVEN

You're right. And, I really wish I would've realized that sooner. But, I appreciate the opportunity.


Raven collects her box up from the chair and heads to leave.


DONNA

Raven?


Raven comes back over to Donna.


DONNA

You're headstrong, impatient, but you're also creative, talented. And one day you're going to make a fabulous designer.


RAVEN (smiling)

Really? You think so?


DONNA

If I didn't think so would I be offering you your job back?


Raven drops her box and screams with excitement. Donna's facial expression shows that her eardrums cannot handle the noise. Raven gives Donna a hug as Tiffany comes running in with a pouty face.


TIFFANY

No!


***


Eddie is at Cory and Raven's house sitting at the bench. Cory is at the counter. Chelsea arrives through the back door.


CHELSEA

Well, I got your message. 'Tato-haters.


EDDIE

Chels, Cory and I wanted to tell you how sorry we are about what happened to Abe. And in his honor, we took the money we made and donated it to the community garden. Look.


Eddie holds up a receipt for Chelsea.


CHELSEA (surprised)

What?


EDDIE

There's the receipt.


CHELSEA (touched)

You guys! Oh, Abe would've been proud. Thank you.


CORY

Oh, no problem Chelsea. You know, we just wanted to make it up to you and show you that Potato Abe meant a lot...


Cory's speech is interrupted when he spots eyes on the cookie he is holding.


CORY

...Wait, is it just me, or does this oatmeal cookie look exactly like Vin Diesel?


Eddie and Chelsea take a look at it.


EDDIE

It is amazing!


CHELSEA

Yeah!


CORY

People would line up for blocks to see this!


CHELSEA

Yeah, we could make a fortune! (on Cory and Eddie's look) Hey, it didn't come from my garden.


Victor comes in from the lounge room. The kids rush over with the cookie.


EDDIE

Check it out, Mr. B! Look at what we got.


Victor laughs, unsure. He takes a bite from the cookie.


VICTOR

Mmmm. You know what, I'm not to crazy about the raisins, but not bad.


He takes another bite. Chelsea bursts into a hysterical scream, tilting her head back and leaning on Cory.


CHELSEA

Why?!!!!!!!


***


END CREDITS


***


That's So Raven © Walt Disney. No infringement intended through the transcription of this episode originally written by Deborah Swisher.

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